Tags: mani, manicure, massage chair, pedi, pedicure
I am not anti-manicures and pedicures. I am just cheap.
I’m always justifying them this way, “For $35-50, I could buy a pair of jeans.” And then I buy the $6 polish and think I’ll just do my nails myself. Then my bathroom drawer gets filled with a rainbow array of colors and my fingernails get lonely. But the toes. Whoa! They get lots of lovin’. They are now sporting neon green.The last time I got a mani-pedi was in April. It was pre-vacation so I wanted to be kinda fancy.
The Vietnamese wife-and-husband couple worked on me simultaneously. As if I were a project. I felt like Dorothy when she goes to the Land of Oz and everyone is sprucing her up…shining her ruby slippers, curling her hair. Team effort, ya know? I really don’t like people fussing over me like that. Especially when my feet are calloused from soccer. And my pinky toe toenails could never make it in the foot modeling world.
So if it’s not embarrassing enough having a man trim and soak and scrub and paint your toenails, the massage chair was the topper. Or should I say the bottomer.
There was this massage chair doing its 20-minute routine. At about minute 15, it felt like a fist was twisting across my butt and staying there. I didn’t know whether to bolt out of my seat and run to the bathroom or just sit there and take it in the…well you know.
If I spoke up to protest about the massage chair getting frisky, I worried there would be a lost-in-translation moment.
So I kept quiet. I left in the yellow, flimsy flip-flops. And never went back.
Maybe that’s why I don’t enjoy partaking in the mani pedi. Too much attention on me. And my butt.