peskypippi.comBecause I have a lot to say…

How many plastic spider rings does it take to raise a child from toddler to teenager? In our case, 500.

I invested in a whopping bag of plastic spider rings, when my oldest son was about three. Five hundred of them. “These will come in handy to top cupcakes, to add to goody bags, and to play jokes on people,” I had thought. Whoa! So many fun times ahead!

Well. My oldest son just turned 14 years old this week. When it was time to decorate his cake, I rummaged through the bin where I keep cupcake papers, food coloring, sprinkles, birthday candles, and plastic spider rings.

There was only one spider ring left. What?!

We had finally exhausted our supply. I had baked an abundance of cupcakes over the years to deliver to school functions, added the rings to birthday goody bags, and distributed them at Halloween.

The rings marked milestones in my son’s life. They took him from toddler to teen. And now, the spiders are gone.

But the other day, as my son stood there in the kitchen–standing 6 ft. 1 in. tall–he tasted his mud pie birthday cake and giddily shrieked, “This is your best cake yet, Mom!”

His enthusiasm and kindness are reminders that despite age (and height), he is still the same on the inside.

Chocolate-chip cookies…again?

No way!

Do you want to be the coolest Mom ever? How about making one giant cookie…with giant impact. What ’til your kids see this! They will be stunned and awed, just like in Uncle Buck. Remember the giant pancake?

Click here for my best chocolate-chip-cookies-on-Earth recipe.

So, instead of plopping the dough as you would for individual cookies, make one giant plop onto a parchment paper-lined cookie sheet and smash down and smooth out with a spatula. Bake at 350 degrees about 12 minutes and keep an eye on it. Take it out just before you think it’s done (the one in the pic is a little overcooked…my bad…I was on Twitter).

Once cooled, you can frost it to make a smiley face, as in my birthday “cake” last year. Click here to see that beauty. Or you can cut into a heart. Brilliant…just in time for Valentine’s Day!

C is for Cookie. Or for “Crap, I just ate too much damn cookie.”

This peanut butter cookie recipe is my grandmother’s. I have her recipe card–stained with butter–written in her curly script. She made these cookies in the Great Depression. So not only are these suckers tasty, they are best served with a glass of American history.

Peanut Butter Cookies

• 1/2 cup brown sugar
• 1 cup white sugar
• 1/2 cup peanut butter
• 1/4 cup melted butter
• 1 egg
• 1 cup flour
• 1/2 tsp. baking soda

Combine butter, peanut butter, sugars, eggs.  Add in baking soda, Then flour. Mix dough. Roll into balls and place onto parchment paper-line cookie trays. Flatten criss-cross with a fork (can dip fork into water so it doesn’t stick). Bake about 8-10 minutes in a 375 degree oven. I take them out a little early for chewy cookies.

Then I proceed to eat about seven. These Great Depression cookies are perfect for the anti-dieters.

Here’s a recipe (and a how-to video starring Pippi) for easy fruit-and-protein smoothies you can make for your kids. These make a great, healthy after-school snack.

Here’s what you need:

• Blender
• Milk (or flavored yogurt such as peach or raspberry…or orange sherbet is even yummier)
• Frozen berries (strawberries, blueberries)
• Protein powder (I selected whey-based protein powder that is pretty much flavorless)
• Banana (the browner, the better)

As you’ll see from the video, the kids love like tolerate these. The reception from my youngest was “huh.”

You see, I forgot that they prefer smoothies made with yogurt instead of milk. Or better yet, orange sherbet. But who wants to shoot another video? Not me.

Smooth move, Pippi…

By now you’ve heard that January Jones of Mad Men fame has been eating her placenta (she gave birth to her baby and the infamous placenta last fall).

I couldn’t resist Googling placenta recipes. I was curious if you add it to stir-fry, bake it, freeze it, or add it to chocolate-chip cookies.

You might be surprised at how many recipes there are. Let’s see, I found roast placenta, placenta cocktail, placenta lasagna, placenta spaghetti Bolognese.

It seems like the most popular way is to dehydrate your placenta (think beef jerky). Turns out that the placenta is packed with vitamins and some believe that the placenta can be used to help in the early stages of postpartum depression.

Placenta. It’s what’s for dinner.

Is that spinach in your smoothie, or are you happy to see me?

I wrote about the ease and nutrition of protein breakfast smoothies awhile back. Check that here. My newest ingredient? Spinach. Yeah, you heard me. They are officially renamed to Pippi’s Peppy Popeye Smoothies. These nutrition-packed suckers are perfect for when I am running late. Getting the kids out the door for school. And oops, I forgot one of my earrings. And my navy tights don’t match my black outfit. And where is my phone and where are my keys? Time to go. NOW.

But wait! Don’t forget to eat your salad for breakfast! (Seriously, you can’t even taste it. It just looks a teensy bit gaggy.) You, too, can buzz up the smoothie while yelling “Hurry! Time to go! Finish your breakfast! Brush your teeth! Shoes on! Jackets! Backpacks!”

Just talk to my friend Sara, who also sneaks in vegetables. She’s on Twitter @Sar_Wah and her blog is http://www.tisthelife.com/. She’s a super healthy Mum who tries to eat right and have a fulfilling life. Go Sara!

Pippi’s Peppy Popeye Smoothies

• a blender
• a cup or so of nonfat milk
• a banana
• big scoop or 2 Tbs. protein powder (preferably plain)
• handful of frozen blueberries
• two ginormous handfuls of washed, fresh spinach

Check out the jumbo bag of spinach. I don’t know whether to eat it. Or sleep on it.

Breakfast is important. Partake! And maybe, with the added spinach, you can kick some ass today.

Got balls? Sagging cake balls?

I received a handy-dandy cake pop maker for Christmas. Here’s how it works:

1. Plop in some cake batter.
2. Close the lid.
3. Wait 7 minutes.
4. Presto. Your cake balls (cake pops) are ready.
5. Time to frost and decorate. Just like Martha would.
6. Stick a stick in them and serve. Or gift them to your neighbors. With pride.

They are supposed to look like these:

But mine turned out like this. My neighbors sure are lucky!

Cookie recipes have been flying in as a result of a little, global cookie contest. Tasters have voted. Here is what they said:

‘Tis the season of sharing. So here is my recipe, y’all:

Pesky-Pippi’s-Best-Chocolate-Chip-Cookies-on-Earth Recipe

• 3 cups flour
• 1 1/4 teaspoons baking soda
• 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1 1/2 teaspoons coarse salt
• 2 1/2 sticks (1 1/4 cups) unsalted butter
• 1 1/4 cups (10 ounces) brown sugar
• 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons granulated sugar
• 2 large eggs
• 2 teaspoons natural vanilla extract
• 3 cups chocolate chips (I like half semi-sweet, half milk chocolate…then you can use the rest of the bags for nibbling.)
• sea salt

1. 1. Sift together dry ingredients and set aside.
2. 2. Cream butter and sugars together for 5 minutes.
3. Add eggs and vanilla.
4. Add dry ingredients and mix until just combined.
5. Mix in chocolate chips.
6. Drop onto parchment paper-lined baking sheet in a preheated 350 degree oven.
7. Sprinkle lightly with sea salt and bake until golden brown. (I like mine chewy and a little undercooked. I also like raw dough, so there you go.)

Enjoy! Peace out,

Pippi

Do you have a kick-ass chocolate chip cookie recipe? But is your cookie the best chocolate chip cookie on Earth? We’ll just see about that.

My buddy Bernie all the way in Australia–check her on Twitter @TheBernieBrand–and I, from the United States of America, are co-hosting a global contest of sorts. No legal fine print, just roll with it.

We are searching out the word’s best chocolate chip cookie recipe. Barring a taste test, we are evaluating cookies based exclusively on looks. Kinda like a fashion show for chocolate chip cookies.

Email your recipe and photo of your cookie to peskypippi@gmail or message me on Twitter @PeskyPippi. No stock photos: I am no chump. Deadline: Sunday, December 11. I will feature the YOU and your cookie in an upcoming blog. Imagine the bragging rights in your last-minute Christmas letter.

Yeah, quick deadline, but win-win for everyone. Imagine all the baking going on around the globe this weekend.

Two pies down, two to go. As in: I have baked two pies so far and have two more to bake. I didn’t EAT two pies already. Silly. That’s for tomorrow!

Pies are so easy to buy. And they are cheap too.

I am no pie snob. I will eat any pie put in front of me.

What compels me to make these suckers from scratch? My Grandmother. She was a good baker and she passed those skills along to me. So, on this Thanksgiving Eve, I am baking pies from scratch because I am thankful that I had my Grandmother in my life for so many years and I carry her love inside of me.

And this is why I cut the cold butter into the flour and add ice cold water to make pie crusts. And this is why I fold the corn syrup with the butter and the pecans to make pecan pie. And this is why I search out new recipes for homemade chocolate fudge pie with Oreo crust. Because I want to.

Because even though I can easily buy pies–and I was a little tempted this year–I NEED to make these myself. And fill the kitchen with wonderful smells. And serve my family and guests a little bit of lovin’ from my Grandmother.

Happy Thanksgiving.