“Can You Fit Into the Booth?”…and other funky questions they ask you at restaurants.
Today, I lunched with my friends after soccer (soccer as in football for my global friends). Yeah, we are a bunch of jocks. Hungry jocks.
In we walked into this Thai restaurant. The five of us were sweaty and a little crazy. Giddy from scoring so many goals, ya know? The restaurant was totally empty and we could basically sit anywhere. We eyed the booth. The hostess/waitress had other plans for us: the dreaded table out in the open by the kitchen.
“Nah,” I said, “We’d like the booth please.”
She goes, “Can you fit into the booth?” Say what??
We’re like, “Yeah we can fit.” And to ourselves, we’re like: we just worked out; if we’re too big for a booth, maybe we should order a salad. With the dressing on the side. Gotta watch those carbs. Seriously? Way to sell us a three-course meal by insinuating that we are too large.
But it was probably just a case in lost in translation. Because she suggested drinks (yes!) and appetizers (no way!)
Oh, and by the way, booths are my all-time favorite places to sit. Love the vinyl bench seat. Love cozying up to my buddies—my sweaty, stinky buddies.
Here are other questions that bug me at restaurants:
- “So, will it just be the two of you?” Uh, yeah. Ya got a problem with that? The other day, my husband and I took our son out for lunch and the hostess asked exactly that. “So, just the three of you.” Why yes, isn’t three good enough for you? And what if you went out solo? Hostesses, bet ya didn’t know you needed to be more aware of your line of questioning, did ya?
- “Is everything tasting OK?” And you think, yeah, it tastes OK. Not great, not the best ever. But OK.
- “Can I take your plate or are you still working on that?” when there’s like ratty old carrot left. And the fork is resting on the plate. Gee, no, I’m going to pick up the plate and lick it. You know how you should respond?
“Can you please box up the rest?”
If I keep eating like that, I just might be able to fit into the booth the next time…