Vegetables are Dangerous

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Posted by peskypippi | Posted in Humor | Posted on 17-08-2014

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It’s a good thing I can’t grow vegetables. Because they’re dangerous. Proceed with caution.

The other day, I was chewing on a carrot. When, all of a sudden, the carrot split in multiple pieces and I started choking.

And then, not too long ago, same thing, but with celery. Those slippery little suckers, with their strings that get caught in your throat. Total choking hazard.

I tried to grow vegetables. My husband even built me a special raised garden with a rabbit-proof fence. We brought in soil. We tilled the soil. We planted. We fertilized.

And then I took over the tending of the vegetable plants.

I bought extra chicken manure. The more manure, the merrier. Right?

Wrong!

I killed every one of those plants. It was too much nitrogen. But it’s a good thing. Because danger was growing.

For the record, I have never ever choked on a cupcake.

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