With Super Moms, Something’s Gotta Give

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Posted by peskypippi | Posted in Celebrations, Childrearing, Family, Mothering, Traditions | Posted on 03-11-2011

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Moms are the heart and soul of the family. Remember that.

No pressure! In our perfectionist, over-achieving attempt to be Super Moms, something’s gotta give. I am learning this.

Like many mothers, I care (maybe too much) about my family. I strive to parent and raise my children properly. I work outside of the home and give my 100% brain power to be successful in my job. I am a good enough wife who really can make incredible gravy. Oh, and I’ve been told that my banana bread could be served to angels. I am the organizer and planner of family activities and celebrations.

Just yesterday, I had three conversations with three different friends. Here is how the conversations went:

  1. One dear friend has a newborn and is returning to work. She has four other children. We talked about the pressures we put on ourselves to do the right things and how we put family first, before ourselves. Always.
  2. Another friend was telling me about the amazing birthday party she is throwing for her daughter. She says she is not a half-assed mother. I know this because I do the same thing. And to use the same metaphor, my mothering is an ass the size of a truck. Kids are only young once, so why not make a memorable birthday party?
  3. Finally, a third friend, who is a new mother, and I were talking about over caring and how sometimes, maybe, we need to care a little less. Or maybe, it’s really that we need to care a little bit more about ourselves.

So, what is the something’s-gotta-give I’m referring to in my life? Housework. When you visit my house and take your shoes off, I cannot promise that you will leave with your socks clean. Hey, I have a dog that sheds and kids that eat like dogs.

Instead, I focus my time and energy and doing the little things–and the big things–to make happy, nurturing, and enriched lives for my children. My youngest son’s picture he drew of his favorite things is proof of this: family picnics and baking cookies with Mom.

We, Moms, are helping to guide, support, and make positive memories for our children. No pressure.

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Comments (15)

Hear, hear!!! Kitchen: nuff said.
Also…didn’t I just clean all of this @#$%& up 10 minutes ago?!

Love that drawing. Sounds like you’ve got your priorities straight to me! I heard a quote just yesterday ‘The time of having it all is past, because if you have it all, you’re really just doing everything half-way’

Pippi, you knocked it out of the ballpark with this one!

Oh, thanks! I’m glad you can relate to Super Mom tendencies many of us have!

Talk soon,
Pippi

That is a most excellent quote. All about priorities. Thanks for sharing!

Take care,
Pippi

Yeah, it’s like why make your bed when you’re gonna unmake your bed in 16 hours.

Thanks for posting,
Pippi

I am so glad you mentioned that if you take your shoes off your socks will not be clean. I absolutely love that. I get worried when I have family over or my few friends because of the dog hair. Mable has her own couch due to it. Company sits on that couch also. I always warn them. My house is cluttered and not perfectly clean. I am happy with that. A not so clean house shows your care for your family and are spending more time with your kids than you are cleaning your house. You will walk in my front door and automatically run into a stroller. My living room is full of baby items such as a play pen, swing, bouncy seat, bumbo seat, blankets, clothes, diapers and all his toys are usually scattered about the floor. Not only when you walk into my house will you be greeted with the toothless grins of a beautiful baby boy but also hear the laughter of three other wild crazy children (when they are here) and the wags of the tails of my wonderfully disobedient dogs. Under this mess, clutter and chaos is a loving family and that is what matters. Children and our dogs know they are loved and not ignored. A messy house will be there tomorrow but you never know if your family will. Family will always come first in our lives. I have also been told that our cluttered and somewhat messy house feels cozy.
My home is not a museum. Never has and never will be. My home is one of comfort, care and love and I am proud of it. If anyone every feels uncomfortable in my home, they can get out the door as easy as they came in. Just watch out for the stroller and dont let my dogs out.

Melissa, Thank you for your awesome comments. Why is it that women need to prove their worth with a clean house? Save that for the old Spic ‘n Span commercials. We prove our worth, well, through our kids. By raising bright, loved, thoughtful, creative, caring children. Right?

A clean house gives the “appearance” that you have it all together and you are in control. Why must we use that as means to judge another? Why must we judge another in the first place? (I am actually highly judgmental of myself and others, so who am I to talk!)

We are good, good mothers and people. And the toothless smiles or the smiles with braces and the soccer clothes strewn on the floor and the science projects half-done on the dining room table and the artwork taped on the fridge and the oodles of dog hair from Mable and Lucy are proof that we lead full lives. Full of love and activity. Full is good. Empty and sparse, not good.

Thanks again and please keep in touch,
Pippi

Lucy is actually a “friend” haha. She comes to visit Mable when my best friend comes to visit. She is just like our own. I recently took in another addition to the family. Not sure on his name yet. Either Rocky or Kipper 🙂

Well I don’t know any living Mables, though I had two great-Aunts named Mable “back in the day.” You got a puppy?? So exciting! I met the cutest chocolate Labrador + cattle dog puppy while out and about and nearly accosted the owners and fondled the poor puppy to death. Maybe I should add puppy to my Christmas wish list? Tell me what kind of dog. I’m a total dog person.

Talk soon,
Pippi

Im not sure exactly but I think he has pit. He will be a bigger dog. He is super sweet though. I got him he was covered in fleas and ticks, his ears were filthy. He has had three baths already this week. I am dog person to. I love em, but Justin is more of a cat person. He is just having to live with my dogs 🙂

I had a Pitbull, actually Staffordshire Terrier and she was the best. Great with my kids when they were babies.

Have fun with the potty training!
Pippi

I also had a part-pit bull – she was the smartest and best dog ! You will have to let us know what you named him!!! Pippi – plenty of time for housecleaning once your retired! 🙂

The husband and I finally agreed on Rocky..Potty training is going pretty well. He goes potty on command now when I take him. No accidents in two days. Well he did have one today but not in the floor. He got up and went and peed in his crate??? At least it was not in the carpet. And his bedding was out of it.

I love the name Rocky! I bet he’s a cutie. Sounds like a smarty pants too w/ the potty training. Pee on the carpet: no like. Keep me posted and please feel free to share a funny story–you can always contact me at peskypippi@gmail.com and I may be able to use it in an upcoming blog!

Take care,
Pippi

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